I Failed a Client and Feel Awful - What Now?

[Nonbeardedman]

This is long... TL;DR provided in the end

I put my website on a pause to make some extra cash from my content writing skills to pay the bills. My existing clients were uncertain with their own content sites so weren't willing to get more work, meaning I was earning nothing for a brief period.

As a solution, my brother asked one of his friends to outsource his writing projects to me.

The problem: he works solely in academic writing, I had never done academic writing and specialized in blog/article writing and writing web content.

I was transparent with them, told them I don't have experience within this field but I'm willing to give it a shot if given the chance. They agreed, started outsourcing the work, and I started delivering the projects.

First few weeks it was report writing and I got the hang of it, didn't get any feedback at all but my brother assured that "if the client is silent, that means everything was fine".

Work moved from writing reports for students to writing the entire final thesis for their degree. Again, didn't have experience with it and told them I'll try it out.

Well... The thesis is written in parts (like you first write the intro and literature review and then wait for your teacher to provide feedback and approve it before moving to the next section) and I wrote about 5 thesis papers' intro and lit. review. After writing five of them, the first one's feedback came and they said I messed up the intro - no problem. I made the revisions the teacher asked and resubmitted it.

That just got back to me a few hours ago and the guy failed his intro - 1.5/5 (although the teacher had mostly positive things to say.) Client was pissed, outsourcer was extremely pissed, brother wasn't mad but kinda disappointed and simply said "bro they're paying us to pass, at least".

I haven't had imposter-syndrome before, and I've been writing for the last 5 years, but now I'm feeling it creep up on me. I'm a firm believer in using negative feedback as a way to polish my skills, and I wouldn't be the writer I am today without it, but this kinda wrecked me ngl.

I mostly think that the reason I feel this one so much is because of the impact of the work. Like, with previous clients worst case scenario was that the content might not rank highly on Google or it would receive some backlash from readers - but this student might have to repeat his course or not get his degree which could potentially affect their future.

Some other context I feel is important to mention:

• The deadlines for these is shorter than normal. According to the work schedule the teachers provide these students, they have a lot of time - a few weeks to a month - to complete each part of the project. These clients however give us only 2-3 days and at max. one week.
• I personally don't believe I owe anyone any kind of guarantee. Only thing I owe them is doing my best work and putting the effort in - which I do, researching the literature, developing frameworks, etc. in-depth. I do the best I'm able to do and if they still can't pass, yes I feel bad, but I don't take all the blame on myself as I didn't do any kind of fraud or something. I kind of compare this with how an SEO makes his best effort to rank on Google, but doesn't guarantee making them rank #1 for every KW. But I don't know if this is the right mindset, because at the same time, I feel I do owe them that and this a non-serious/arrogant attitude.
• The money is good. My dad was the breadwinner but recently got unemployed (forced to resign due to work politics). Dad got 50% of his salary for 3 months (received last month's salary this month) after leaving as a "bonus" for his loyalty with the company. But it was nowhere near enough to keep us afloat. So, with this work coming in, me and my bro have been able to keep the finances in check.
• I used this same intro format for the other theses I wrote, and one of them got approved (again no feedback, just said start the next part), so I think there's a difference in teachers as well (which I obviously can't take into account)
• Finally, I started off pretty enthusiastically with this kind of work as the whole discovery and research excited me. Now, due to the short deadlines and pissy clients, I've started to treat it as a regular office job - just get the work done. And I plan to step back from this work once my dad gets a job so I can go back to starting a brand/business. But right now I feel forced to work for these clients because 1) I need the money to pay the bills and have my family depending on me 2) I've made these commitments with all these clients by writing the first sections of their theses, so now I'm responsible for writing the rest (and they've paid me half amount).

I need advice. Firstly, is it wrong or right that I feel guilty for failing this bad? Is it my fault? Secondly, is my mindset in the right place? I feel I don't owe the clients anything other than my effort, but then again they wouldn't be paying me in the first place if I can't get them to pass their final thesis. This makes me feel like a fake/imposter, am I right to feel this way? How do I overcome it/learn from this and bounce back stronger.

TL;DR: Wrote multiple theses for students and managed to fail one of them despite giving my full effort. Feel awful because I've put this guy's degree at risk and it's making me question my abilities as an academic writer. Need advice on avoiding imposter-syndrome, get my optimism back and bounce back.

 

[mikey3times]

I’m sorry, but you agreed to participate in acedemic fraud? That’s more shameful than “failing a client”. I think you need to evaluate this on a completely different level. Imposter syndrome isn’t your issue. Ethics and Morals are your problems.

 

[CCarter]

I had to run back to my computer for this one...

Is it my fault?

First you all have crossed some moral lines - it is what it is. I own MoneyOverEthics dot com. I can't complain.

However why didn't the guy bother reading the intro himself to simply double-check? Why did he wait till the last second to give you the assignments?

Forget all that - this guy probably deserves to fail. #1 he's cheating, but let's say his profession is a serious one like a doctor or surgeon. Would you trust this guy, who cheated his way through school with your son or daughter's life?

This is the problem where people don't think about the long-term consequences of the future when everyone is just worried about the short-term gains.

Dear God. So it is what it is - but I wouldn't feel guilt, you gave them warnings, hopefully. But they also are looking for a shortcut to a degree. What the fuck is he doing the rest of the time?

There are so many things wrong with his side of the problem BUT you shouldn't feel ANY guilt what-so-ever. You gave fair warning. You get a week a best to do something that with more time and FEEDBACK you could make better.

This is fucking ridiculous you feel an ounce of guilt. I'm more concerned with these type of people getting into serious position of power, authority, or being able to mess with people's lives that have cheated their way at the basic level.

And then I see @JesseEddleman's post here - I mean come on bro - this society is going down the fucking tubes.

This is what happens when you lower standards each generation, and now here we are. I don't know. I'm scared to deal with anyone professionally from the next generations coming up cause now I got to wonder if they cheated their way through medical school, or law school, or whatever.

Guys - Make a lot of money and get the FUCKS out of a society that operates like this. Home-school your kids. This is fucking ridiculous.

Are ya'll trolling me man?

 

[mikey3times]

I’m Liking @CCarter’s post because he is correct that the other guy is the biggest loser here. But I disagree with the part about OP not feeling guilt. OP is a half step behind the client. He should be ashamed. There are thousands of ways to make a few bucks. You don’t have to play this game.

Also, for real, is this a troll?

 

[Ryuzaki]

I'd laugh at everyone involved if this was me. Some moron outsourced his thesis paper (a specialized topic requiring specialized knowledge) to some content mill (with no specialized knowledge), who then asked you (a person with no specialized knowledge on the specialized topic) to write it with a short deadline. What did anyone expect?

"Thanks for the money, adios!" would be my response, unless they don't fire you, in which case I'd either keep taking the money if I was you, or if I was me I'd question if this is how I want to make money. It's kind of like when a married person tries to cheat with you, and your buddy says "they're going to cheat with someone, might as well be you, it's not your fault." ... It's your fault for letting it be you.

You're supposed to have hesitation before engaging in unscrupulous actions, not guilt after the fact.

By the way, you were set up to fail, so don't feel guilty about failing. There's other things to feel guilty about if you desire.

 

[Nonbeardedman]

Ethics and Morals are your problems.

First you all have crossed some moral lines

I actually looked up academic fraud after reading what you guys stated and I'm actually a bit shook rn. I never really looked at it that way, I've always been fed this idea from the writers in communities I'm part of that this is actually a field of "academic writing". I've done these kinds of things where I help my friends with their assignments and stuff before and thought that this was kind of the same.

But I get what you guys are saying... but now I'm facing a dilemma.

I've already taken the half-payment of these clients, and have spent majority of it. So, what do I do now? What I'm thinking now is to find some clients by sending a bunch of emails and going on UpWork or something and in the mean time, stop accepting any more of these projects, but complete the ones I've already committed to. Also, how do I convince my family to get on the same "moral grounds" as me? They're dependent on the income and I'm damn sure they probably are going to try to convince me to keep going (since this is the bulk of money that's supporting us rn).

Fuck, now I feel worse. I've always been so high on morals, being religious and all but now I'm just... fucked

Jeez got any advice? I'd really appreciate it now.

 

[CCarter]

But I disagree with the part about OP not feeling guilt.

If you have to feed your family - it's hard to stay "moral" free if there are very little options. Most of us have experienced bad times, so that's the reason I'm TRYING to let him off with the guilt. It's one thing to sit in a 1st world country and judge people's actions. It's another to be in a 3rd world or even worse place and try to get out but have very little opportunities.

Can we always have hustled harder in the past - YES. But shit happens. A simple example for people in the 1st world is medical bills. You get hit with a string of those and your whole world gets turned upside-down. You'll do anything to get back.

 

[Smith]

I've always been so high on morals, being religious and all but now I'm just... fucked

This is a joke... right?

The company that hired you assigned a piece of work to you that you were not qualified to write. It's their fault. Take the money and run.

Make a lot of money and get the FUCKS out of a society that operates like this. Home-school your kids. This is fucking ridiculous.

This right here is the path forward.

 

[mikey3times]

It's one thing to sit in a 1st world country and judge people's actions. It's another to be in a 3rd world or even worse place and try to get out but have very little opportunities.

Fair point.

@Nonbeardedman I’ll cut you some slack. Count this as a mistake and figure out how you can use your skills to level up. It won’t be easy, but it will be miles better than this.

 

[Nonbeardedman]

so that's the reason I'm TRYING to let him off with the guilt.

I appreciate your perspective, seriously. I treasure all your posts and responses and am always grateful for your advice.

But, everyone has certain priorities in life and I prioritize my religion/values higher than money. Heck I've even refused to write multiple articles on drugs where the business owner was a weed seller or something. I've even refused to write for a fitness company that was known for selling their customer's genetic data to big pharma - all because of my main priority.

I don't doubt that I may have fucked up big time by digging a trench so deep for myself only now to realize months after that I've been digging under my feet. I wish to start over, away from this kind of work and back to content writing (at least for feeding my family) until I get a proper business up and running (I have plans but am in a tight situation currently)

This right here is the path forward.

Again, I wish to make money in a proper way. If I see another path I'll rush to it, I don't wish to continue like this

 

[CCarter]

I prioritize my religion/values higher than money.

And that's why you are in the situation you are in.

Dan Peña states it multiple times:
Which countries are the most religious? The poorest.

Which countries are the poorest?? The most religious.

If religion worked to get people out of poverty- the most religious countries wouldn't be the poorest.

At some point something has to give. I would have written those weed and fitness articles, you'd have more clients, and not academic fraud hanging over you.

Last I check weed doesn't kill anyone. And fitness, everyone on earth knows how to lose weight, more calorie burning than intake.

But now here you are, got potential doctors and surgeons going into the medical field, don't know if this was the degree - just making shit up, going into their professions and having to deal with real life shit with patient's lives on the line.

You can study programming and become a newbie or intermediate with 2 weeks. The opportunities are out here. If you don't open your eyes to them, well, here you are.

 

[bernard]

Eh, if I understand correctly, you're helping people commit academic fraud for money?

If I hire someone to burglarise my neighbor I can't really complain when they only brought pack the ice cubes and not the diamonds.

This and many other things are why I no longer trust people with degrees.

 

[Nonbeardedman]

And that's why you are in the situation you are in.

I cannot abandon my humanity for monetary gain Carter. And I believe there are many other factors besides religion that could contribute to a country declining, correlation does not equal causation. The reason I accepted academic work, I've stated, is that I wasn't educated, nor aware (well ignorant is probably the right word) for the nature of the work I was doing.

If religion worked to get people out of poverty- the most religious countries wouldn't be the poorest.

Religion, at least my religion, doesn't promise anyone to get out of poverty. It teaches you to live with the afterlife in mind. I know that sounds like mythical bs to many here and many other successful people. I was born in a religious family but I also never "got" my religion. It wasn't only after I studied it myself, the complete books, that I got a grasp on the realities. It has only made me stronger since then. Getting involved in academic fraud is an unfortunate turn for me, it's not something I'm proud of otherwise I would've tried to justify my position, but after looking this up myself and hearing others' comments here I acknowledge that I've clearly fucked up.

But now here you are, got potential doctors and surgeons going into the medical field, don't know if this was the degree - just making shit up, going into their professions and having to deal with real life shit with patient's lives on the line.

Okay man cut me some slack here... these were business, MBA degrees which would probably get these guys into HR or something - not that it makes it any less bad, just trying to say it ain't doctors and lawyers or anything.

You can study programming and become a newbie or intermediate with 2 weeks. The opportunities are out here. If you don't open your eyes to them, well, here you are.

I admit I've been blinded to the other opportunities and have put off progressing further from being a content writer. So I believe finding newer clients and getting my skills polished is a better path than this.

Eh, if I understand correctly, you're helping people commit academic fraud for money?

Apparently yes and I done messed up. So point taken from my original post, I don't feel guilty now about failing the client but am feeling like deep shit for accepting these projects in the first place... and am probably gonna sit down thinking about how to move away from this into some kind of work that can keep the finances running

 

[Nonbeardedman]

I just want to thank you all for the eye opener and advice. BuSo has been pretty generous to me, given my ignorant line of questioning and long-ass posts.

I have a rough idea of what I need to do now, so I'll hopefully come back in a month's time with a positive update, starting on a newer path

 

[Jesse]

I've worked for around 20 years in an industry that many people find morally bankrupt, the majority of that as a writer.

With that said, I'm of the opinion that you're being entirely too hard on yourself. Academia is a joke due to rampant grade inflation and other factors, and the only "academic fraud" that I see in your situation is this hilarious possibility I have in my head of people using student loans to pay other people to do their work. I'd also suggest that this notion that academia is some type of sacred cow has been obsolete for decades.

Not to get all "I will be glad and say 'my idea is on the road'" on you, but if you would rather pass up on these types of opportunities due to whatever ethical concerns, then that's probably for the best because that is ultimately what will make you happy. Maximizing the amount of money you make doesn't always have to be the primary concern.

After all, it's just you and the people who depend on you who will have to live with your decision. If you're good with that, then don't worry about what anyone else thinks. You and you alone determine your own framework of morality and act within it.

 

[DanielS]

Give yourself some grace, @Nonbeardedman. You were/are in a vulnerable position, an opportunity that looked good on paper came your way, and then reality hit once you had already started to do the work.

You were stuck in a position where it was actually better for you to finish the project to the best of your ability than for you to say, "Actually, I'm not qualified to do this work so you'll need to find someone else to do it." to your "employer."

We all make mistakes and get ourselves into situations that we aren't actually qualified to be in. Sometimes, we're able to pull through and we learn something in the process, and other times we aren't able to and we fail - but we still learn.

This single instance doesn't define your entire existence as a writer/entrepreneur/person.

Take the lessons you've learned and move on, and don't let this instance make you scared of getting outside your comfort zone and taking on higher skilled work.

By the way, the client is a complete moron and deserved to fail. There are no shortcuts and they just learned it the hard way - you helped them learn a valuable lesson.

 

[secretagentdad]

The only "academic fraud" that exists is that gangs of sanctimonious gangsters managed to paywall and gate keep so much of our society its ridiculous.

Get over your religious hang ups. They're just levers used to control you and the people you love. You can be a moral person just fine with out bundling every decent behavior together and adding silly bed time stories. Dogma is dumb and it doesn't make you a better person. Just a deceived idiot. Stop being a deceived idiot.

 

[bernard]

I just want to make clear that I have zero moral issues with you @Nonbeardedman writing these articles.

You're not the problem, make the money, don't feel bad about academia, it's almost entirely corrupt. My point is that people who hire you to commit "academic fraud" have absolutely zero moral standing to blame you for anyone.

 

[CCarter]

these were business, MBA degrees

That actually puts them into CEO positions and other positions of authority. Most CEOs hired have MBA degrees. Very few don't. The ones that don't usually started the company.

If they aren't good the business will suffer and employees will lose their jobs. Families suffer.

Maybe a dad loses his job cause of work politics and therefore his sons have to be the breadwinners and they decide to help others cheat for MBA degrees renewing the cycle of bad management.

If they aren't good in an industry and pull down the business the industry may suffer. A prime example is a pharmaceutical company. That company suffers and goes bankrupt can disrupt people getting their medication.

You can be a bright employee but get stuck under a worthless manager which ends up sucking your joy out of life and giving you more work. I've been there, we probably all have. It puts stress up you, your family, and again creating all sorts of unforeseen problem. You'll wonder how this idiot manager got their job - probably cause they cheated their way through school to get their degree.

There is always long-term unforeseen consequences when you put stupid people in charge of groups of people.

 

[chubes]

I don't think you did anything wrong. I used to write essays for people in college. Even after college I did a bit of this. Kids are using Chat GPT like crazy. It's life.

Unrelated, but also something I've witnessed firsthand: Many Division 1 athletes don't do their own schoolwork.

One time, my friend paid me to edit his final thesis paper for a class. I left some profane notes for him in all caps thinking he would proofread it before handing it in. The dude handed in a final thesis paper with all my notes, including the word FUCK written in all caps and then hit me up about it afterwards, saying dude why did you make all caps curse word notes in my paper.

Nothing came of it, but I'm just saying. The guy is now working for some sales job scheming just like he did in college. This kind of stuff is widespread. College is another system that needs a full rework.

One could also argue that this guy is being resourceful for farming out his essays.

 

[freshpeppermint]

I can't believe people here think that someone can "cheat" and be a doctor or something significant like that lol.

I was talking to a friend who used to be in engineering, he told me they keep it unnecessarily hard because of unions or something so not as many people become it.

And the material they learn is way harder than what they do at their job. Most engineers aren't doing cutting-edge stuff. And the select few that are, are leagues above and they probably get paid well too.

My friend just got his business degree and he told me how useless it was, he told me he didn't learn anything of use. He told me how it was at the same level or easier as high school and that anyone who could do well in high school could do the job and they teach/give training during the job.

I also know 2 people who cheat on many assignments. Like, guys, some guy cheating on an assignment isn't going to be that big of a deal. He's not going to be an engineer who will let bridges get destroyed lol. And if this guy was incompetent for the job he will most likely fail at the training level. It's not like this guy's going to become a heart surgeon by cheating his way through university operating on someone you lol.

I remember one of my friends he got a job as a developer without a degree and everyone working at his job had a degree. They told him how many people failed the interview, even ones with degree. Right now he's doing like some quick college degree from some place he got in a few months and cheated his way a lot. His friends are doing that route and I think 2 of them landed dev jobs.