Does anyone else feed on struggle and hardship?

bernard

BuSo Pro
Joined
Dec 31, 2016
Messages
2,506
Likes
2,196
Degree
6
I'm sure there are others here who have it similar, but also some who hopefully got over it.

When I say "feed on struggle", I don't in the "histrionic" sense, as in needing drama or anything like that.

What I mean is, being "at your best", when life is hard. I find this have been with me most my adult life. I am simply in better shape, better mind, more focused, more productive, more gregarious and with fewer neurotic traits, when life is difficult. When life is good, I get complacent, lazy, neurotic.

I'm sure this has some psychological explanation, but I am more interested in if anyone else found a way to keep the fire burning, even when life is good.
 
I work best under pressure, which can be self-inflicted or from outside events. Sometimes I feel like I can ONLY work under pressure. This leads to procrastination until my suffering becomes sufficient to force my motivation to awaken. I've been able to start to learn how to enjoy, or at the very least try to get something from suffering.

I think it has something to do with the release of adrenaline from some sort of leftover fight or flight mechanism that heightens awareness and performance. I try to harness it -- with mixed results. I'm getting better at it.
 
^ Yes, that is how I have it too, but it isn't optimal is it? It would be better to have a more stable drive in good or bad.
 
Okay, I am going to go all metaphysical on you guys.

It is not easy, but we gotta master the mind.

Seeing that you automatically work harder and are more motivated when you really have to get your shit together, you can grow to trust that some intelligence within you is automatically taking care of you.

As humans, every part of ourselves is constantly changing: moods, thoughts and opinions are in a constant flux. So when we are going through a period of time when we are less productive, the mind starts to become fearful and doubtful. Mind always identifies with whatever state you are going through at the moment and assumes that this is what it is going to be like from now on.

The key is to know that whatever the shitty state or mood you might be going through, that this is nothing, but a cloud passing. The real you is in the background and the real you need to not worry or have any doubt. Cause the mind loves to go negative and paint doom picture of how it is going downhill from here. Don't believe the mind.

There is a greater intelligence in us that knows when to work hard with one-pointed concentration, when to procrastinate, when to rest. So if we trust that more and more, we come more from a place of stability, enduring strength, unchanging awareness.

It also helps if you clarify for yourself why you want to work and succeed. If the reason is purely selfish, then we get only so much energy. Of course, you can force it, jack up your energy with some practice or some substance and get results. But in this universe in the long run it all comes back to you.

If reason is more impactful for more people than yourself, then it is easier to be motivated. The greater the impact the more the motivation. If you are working to bring good to your family it is greater than just for yourself, if it is bringing good to many people it is even better than just making your own family rich. The more good your work brings to society, other people, etc the more good vibes you receive and the more motivated you become. This way you move away from being fear motivated towards love-good oriented, from darkness to light.

"Just as treasures are uncovered from the earth, so virtue appears from good deeds, and wisdom appears from a pure and peaceful mind. To walk safely through the maze of human life, one needs the light of wisdom and the guidance of virtue."

~ Buddha

But yeah of course we all struggle with this, it is life man. The ups and the downs, learn to love it all.
 
Last edited:
When life is good, I get complacent, lazy, neurotic.

I've seen so many people destroy their own lives in order to get back to having a goal or a problem to deal with, which is where they are comfortable.

"People like pulling out the stuffing when they sit down, so it passes the time"
~ John Denver​
The analogy paraphrased is that people get comfortable on a nice chair and all is fine, but they get fidgety because few of us have experienced peace for any length of time. They start picking out the stuffing of the cushion they're on until they destroy their comfort and peace.

The psychological explanation you alluded to is summarized as self-sabotage. Why does it happen? We are too familiar with disruption and addicted to the anxiety and melancholy. Having chaos going on makes some people feel important. Otherwise they're just a piece of dust in a vast universe. Some people find meaning in solving trivial problems instead of pursuing advancement. Maybe they don't believe they can do it, or they don't think it's possible. Other's take pride in being poor and in being victimized (at least 50% of people currently are playing the "victim olympics" game of inventing new ways to explain why they're more oppressed than you).

But being motivated in those times makes sense evolutionarily. You better do something at that time or you risk starving, basically.
 
Back