Switching Off

jxs

jxs

Joined
Feb 16, 2016
Messages
7
Likes
4
Degree
0
Hey everyone.

How do you switch off? Do you ever switch off.

Let me explain.

I actually like to work. I enjoy the process. I like planning things out and I like executing them.

When I'm not working, I'm thinking about working. I have hobbies (rock climbing, hiking with my dogs, very amateur photography) but whenever I'm doing them, or anything non-work-related, I have this thought at the back of my head:

"You should be working."

So I'm curious, does anyone else think like this? I'm not sure it is necessarily a problem, but just wondering how others switch off.
 
I’m starting to realise that this is one of the few downsides to being your own boss and working from home.

If I’m working in an office I go to work, come home at the end of the day and then switch off from work until the next morning.

When I’m working from home there is no end of day. The end of the day is when I decide to stop working, not when I stop getting paid.

I find it really hard to switch off, almost to the point of feeling guilty when I’m doing non-work related stuff. I have to keep telling myself I’m doing this to spend more time with my family, not less.
 
Exactly this.

It's a catch 22: you are working so you can ultimately spend more time with your family, but by working and not spending time with your family.

I'm not a massive fan of the word hustle, but the hustle gods are cruel.
 
That's the issue with having to plant seeds and continually nurture them till they sprout. Most of what we do won't bear fruit for so long we have a hard time connecting the rewards to the work. We just know the rewards are coming and we have to keep working for that to happen.

I deal with this to a degree, but when I hit a good lick like I did this week I feel I can relax some. I try to find this relaxation as much as I can without self-medication with any substances, like through exercise, making sure I'm not multi-tasking when I'm watching a movie, etc.

This type of generalized anxiety isn't real acute in the moment but it can accumulate over time. This on-going stress will have you eventually blow a fuse if you don't get it in check. I'm coming out of a blown fuse period, if I have to be honest with my self. I know of two other posters on this forum who are expressing the same sentiments.

It's like Day One in the Crash Course says. This is a mental game more than it is a physical or economic one.

I feel like the only answer is to hang on until you break through and really feel like you have a good cash flow and security under your belt, or better yet, just to completely embrace the chaos and unpredictable nature of being your own man. It really wasn't until the industrial age, like 1780-1820 or so, that the vast majority of people could even have a nice 9-5 arrangement that sets most of us at ease in one way but robs us of our authentic approach to life.

It's a trade off that I'm willing to take, but we have to be able to float in this groundlessness. I try to remember that down time and switching off makes me more productive when I'm working.

But really, not a single one of us knows what the next day holds for us. Everything else is an illusion, no matter if you're a 9-5'er or an entrepreneur. Understanding that creates the anxiety that we have to keep working to find security before we can relax. "Realizing" that means we should always relax because it'll never not be the case.

I always think about financial security and how we all think that's what it'll take to be happy and relax. But I guarantee that after we all get that, we'll start freaking out about our health.

This isn't a fight we can win. We're guaranteed to lose in the end. So we have to figure out how to relax now.

I think a lot of it has to do with having a well-rounded life. Health, wealth, security, access to food, clothing, a home, a social circle, some form of family, sexual and emotional relationships, expressing one's self authentically, having decent leisure activities that help you grow, having down-time ones that do nothing but blow off steam, working on things that create a positive impact for society, etc.
 
Think like Steve Jobs...

Work. Work. Work...

It's an obsession.

It's extremely difficult for me to enjoy anything these days unless it's work related or if I can somehow twist it to fit into my work.

Then at a certain point you accumulate enough wealth/experience/things, that shit gets even more boring.

Renting a Lamborghini? Meh. I could be working and buy one that's handcrafted from the factory. After awhile all that power would feel mundane. That dopamine hit doesn't last forever. Witnessing the most majestic mountain views? Meh. I could be working and build a million or billion dollar home on the hillside of a mountain or on a private coast line beach. Instead, I'm just standing here, doing nothing but watching, waiting?....

Once you truly get into it, work becomes your drug of choice. Most people can't get into it though, so they don't even understand. Small and simple things give them far too much pleasure.

But that's not to say work can't give you a lot of pain vs pleasure. You can get so addicted to your work that you stay up for days, getting annoyed by anything that takes you away from your work. Even the act of eating meals can be extremely frustrating when your on a roll and just want to keep grinding it out.
 
It's a balance you continually work on (like everything in life). All the money in the world's no good if you can't find meaning (because you'll end up destroying yourself sooner or later).

If grinding is where you find 100% of your purpose, then there's no problem there. But if other things matter to you (and they probably will as you grow older if they don't already), it's up to you to find a way to honor them. Life goes by quickly, and there's no guarantee we're all going to hit the average life expectancy, let alone exceed it. And that doesn't even begin to touch on the lives of our loved ones.

I can already think of nearly 10 people off the top of my head with whom I'd had repeated conversations or interactions who are no longer alive. I'm in my early 30s. The oldest of these people died at 90. The youngest died at 4.
 
Last edited:
Meditation is a good start. Relaxing the body and emptying your mind, you can find how healing it is to be free of the dry repeating thoughts such as "how to make money", "how to squeeze out more profits". Instead by focusing your mental power on your body and by choosing to stay present as pure awareness, you can feel great relief and a sense of lightness, emptiness, spaciousness. It is from this state the true inspiration can come, the ideas that are not limited by our conceptual beliefs.

Of course it is dangerous, if you become too good in meditation. You might be enjoying too much bliss that you will not give a crap to make money.. Until you are forced to. So proceed with caution and do not become too happy too fast. :wink: We need some misery and dissatisfaction to keep evolving and grinding, right? =)
 
I had a mini-epiphany about this today while practicing yoga. I felt my brain holding on to what I constantly have - a tiny little constant focus on what is supposed to be worked on next. It's with me always and is never letting me record what's happening around me. It's keeping me from being present.

This realization has helped me understand the importance of 'letting go'. The definition is evolving for me. I realize it's EXTREMELY important.

As @Andrey says above, its all about balance. You can go full one direction and be zen AF, just sitting in a cave all day so happy and grateful for each heartbeat with no personal belongings except a loin cloth and a mane of hair or the complete opposite.

All I know is that an hour or so of yoga a day has made a big impact for me personally.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back